with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
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