Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
