what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
