I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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