I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Randomize
