is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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