why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
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