Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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