Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
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