Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I'm getting married
To pizza
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize