YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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