You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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