OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Randomize
