He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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