ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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