Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Randomize
