I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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