i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
