CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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