I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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