It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
