I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
