They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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