im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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