I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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