Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
