The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
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