I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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