Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
we're so committed to being not committed
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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