therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize