yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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