Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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