i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
i think i just lost a toe
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
