So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
look no pants
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
