$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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