at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
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