is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Randomize
