his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Randomize
