So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
