Walk of Shame. In a state park.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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