My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
you mean i was at the winter classic?
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
