I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
