He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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