dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
