Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
