sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Randomize
