sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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