Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
