Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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