i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
